Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Excellent
Some days I have buzz words. Today's is excellent. Good thing Pee Wee's not here to yell everytime I say my word of the day. I'm not saying it like Bill or Ted though. Just so you know.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Fetal position
There's a show on the local community radio station called "Environminute." It leaves me feeling totally helpless, hopeless, pointless, and lost. I suppose it's supposed to motivate me. Why would environmentalists want to paralyze people? They wouldn't. I'm just an anomoly. It just seems like these migh be the last few decent years to be alive on this planet. After that, it'll suck. Will it be a desert? Or a smog sauna?
I should do something. But nothing seems effectual. Just like some little heading you can carry over your head. "I Car Pool." So people can think you're doing something. Environmentalism is altruism. Another way to categorize people. A way to make money on an intangible abstract product--Carbon offsetting. You can buy carbon offsetting!? Why not just reduce your output. Carbon offsett credits piss me off to the core of all my principles and logic. I don't really know how popular they are, so I guess I shouldn't worry too much just yet.
When did I become so pessimistic? I'd really like to not be so scared. I try to think of all the good things I have ahead of me. But then I turn on the news and begin to doubt they wil wait for me.
There's a show on the local community radio station called "Environminute." It leaves me feeling totally helpless, hopeless, pointless, and lost. I suppose it's supposed to motivate me. Why would environmentalists want to paralyze people? They wouldn't. I'm just an anomoly. It just seems like these migh be the last few decent years to be alive on this planet. After that, it'll suck. Will it be a desert? Or a smog sauna?
I should do something. But nothing seems effectual. Just like some little heading you can carry over your head. "I Car Pool." So people can think you're doing something. Environmentalism is altruism. Another way to categorize people. A way to make money on an intangible abstract product--Carbon offsetting. You can buy carbon offsetting!? Why not just reduce your output. Carbon offsett credits piss me off to the core of all my principles and logic. I don't really know how popular they are, so I guess I shouldn't worry too much just yet.
When did I become so pessimistic? I'd really like to not be so scared. I try to think of all the good things I have ahead of me. But then I turn on the news and begin to doubt they wil wait for me.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Three versions of what happened today
Version One: Overly Dramatic
There was a police incident one block from work today. There was a man shooting randomly from his balcony. It took them over three hours to apprehend the man. In the mean time, they blocked off second street and warned us not to go outside or near windows. My computer monitor is right in front of a window. I was so frightened.
Version Two: Overly Apathetic
There was a "police incident" near work today. There was this guy randomly shooting from his balcony. Whatever.
Version Three: Close Approximation to my actual reaction
Oh wow, there was a police incident about a block from work today. There was a man randomly shooting from this balcony. We were warned not to go outside or near windows. I wasn't really worried about it, but I think I slouched in my chair a little, so I was lower than the window behind my computer monitor.
On a slightly similar note, Yoko Ono was on Democracy Now today. They played her speech from the opening of her "Peace Tower," which will be lit between the birthday and deathday of John Lennon. It was all about peace, but I can't remember the details, except that they made me cry a little. At work! I find that if I stop and think about the state of the world I fall overwhelmingly sad. I wonder if everyone else is as afraid as me.
There was a police incident one block from work today. There was a man shooting randomly from his balcony. It took them over three hours to apprehend the man. In the mean time, they blocked off second street and warned us not to go outside or near windows. My computer monitor is right in front of a window. I was so frightened.
Version Two: Overly Apathetic
There was a "police incident" near work today. There was this guy randomly shooting from his balcony. Whatever.
Version Three: Close Approximation to my actual reaction
Oh wow, there was a police incident about a block from work today. There was a man randomly shooting from this balcony. We were warned not to go outside or near windows. I wasn't really worried about it, but I think I slouched in my chair a little, so I was lower than the window behind my computer monitor.
On a slightly similar note, Yoko Ono was on Democracy Now today. They played her speech from the opening of her "Peace Tower," which will be lit between the birthday and deathday of John Lennon. It was all about peace, but I can't remember the details, except that they made me cry a little. At work! I find that if I stop and think about the state of the world I fall overwhelmingly sad. I wonder if everyone else is as afraid as me.
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
why isn't this me? I want to feel that much love. I want to come home 8 days in a row and not cry any of them.
I had a dream that I was trapped in a restaurant with an evangelical christian. kill me please. He wouldn't let me not tell him what I was. I woke up feeling lonely.
I have NO friends here. Sorry to whine and all, but it's only one person (Oscar) from being the absolute truth. It's been a month since I've talked to anyone besides Oscar or one of my 4 co-workers. Who are all men. Who are all way older than me. And Oscar's never home. I'm sooo tired of food. Why cook when it's just for me. I did his laundry yesterday because he's really overwhelmed. And I got this sad, youshouldn'thaveIfeelguiltyyoudid, thank you. I just want to kick him and tell him to thank me like a man. That I did it because I thought he'd appreciate it. At least he was relieved I used his quarters to do it.
Why is meeting friends so hard. You can't just tap a random stranger at Barnes and Noble and say "Hey, be my friend." I hate this.
I had a dream that I was trapped in a restaurant with an evangelical christian. kill me please. He wouldn't let me not tell him what I was. I woke up feeling lonely.
I have NO friends here. Sorry to whine and all, but it's only one person (Oscar) from being the absolute truth. It's been a month since I've talked to anyone besides Oscar or one of my 4 co-workers. Who are all men. Who are all way older than me. And Oscar's never home. I'm sooo tired of food. Why cook when it's just for me. I did his laundry yesterday because he's really overwhelmed. And I got this sad, youshouldn'thaveIfeelguiltyyoudid, thank you. I just want to kick him and tell him to thank me like a man. That I did it because I thought he'd appreciate it. At least he was relieved I used his quarters to do it.
Why is meeting friends so hard. You can't just tap a random stranger at Barnes and Noble and say "Hey, be my friend." I hate this.
Monday, October 1, 2007
Sabrina!? NOOOOO!!
I have a bit of an evening TV routine. I get home by 4:30, which means I can catch an episode of Sabrina the Teenage Witch. I watch horrible TV, although, in my defense, the only reality TV I watch is on Bravo or TLC. After Sabrina, I watch Gilmore Girls while I do other random things. I rarely just watch it. Then, there's an episode of Friends, then 1.5 Law and Orders. It used to only be .5 hours because I'd watch BBC News. But I catch that on the Radio at work. Anyway, they've switched Sabrina with Seventh Heaven. I HATE Seventh Heaven. There is not enough I can say to denounce Seventh Heaven. So I suppose I'll have to find something more productive to do with my time. Can I tape Sabrina?
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